#Fail

Whenever I think of the word "fail" I picture Jack Layton in a federal debate, criticising a policy and ending with "#Fail." He would definitely have given me a #Fail for my lack of performance last week. What a week and weekend! $1500+ later and I have a healthy dog, need to find a new vet, ate out multiple times, owe my daughter some (free or cheap) fun after cancelling events and need to talk to the bank about consolidating debt and getting on a financial plan. 

So, once again, same goal but with renewed interest because we can't afford to eat out! Last night while making dinner, I also make rice and curry so I've got that for lunch, because I can't afford to eat out for lunch! So, plan is in place. Groceries are bought. No money is left. Gah. 

Last week sucked. Last week is over. Time to pick up the pieces and continue with a game plan. 

Routines, Again

I took baby steps toward getting routines in place last week. The morning and after school pick up seem to be going much smoother (though there are still lots of tears in the morning) and I'm powering through the CSC. But I've failed at a dinner routine and a nighttime routine. So, I'm going to break it down. This week: dinner routine. This week we are BUSY most nights after work (drinks with friends, a monarch butterfly workshop and a school book sale and curriculum night), so it'll be a challenge to make and eat dinner at a reasonable time this week. So, if we can do it, next week and after will be a breeze. I'm going to start today by writing out the dinners we are going to have every night this week. We have a wipe board on the fridge with the days off the week, so we already have the tools to get organized. I'm going to try to keep meals simple and healthy. We made some super healthy, veggie-packed spaghetti sauce on the weekend, that we can use in a pinch. The fridge and cupboard are filled with veggies and basics and we are ready to roll.

Next week, hopefully, we'll have dinner down and I can work on getting to bed, and getting my daughter to bed, like a civilized person.

Routines

This week, as we continue to try to settle our daughter into full-day junior kindergarten and before and after care, I'm all about the routine. As in I need to develop and adhere to some quick. Quick! I am in desperate need to develop a routine for the morning and actually getting to work on time, a routine for the afternoon and JK pick up, a routine to actually make dinner quickly and healthfully (and not eat out), a routine to get lunches made and forms filled out, a routine for bed time and a before bed routine for me thrown in for good measure (because I don't have a big enough list yet! or actually because I need to take five minutes to actually just take care of me).

I ran across this article by chance today, and I'm hoping that it may be helpful.

I've started reading my CSC text book on the streetcar on the way to and from work, as well as at lunch time -- so that portion of my life is starting to trek along nicely. And the last two days I've walked from the streetcar to work rather than taking the two subway stops south -- it's not a ton of exercise or fresh air but it's a start. And I've been cognisant of whether not I've been smiling while walking -- still working on that RBF, but it's coming along. I really do feel happier when I smile. In the evenings, I've started washing my face and putting on night cream -- which I know a lot of people would say, of course you do, but really I'm more of a fall in bed exhausted with make up on and no mouth guard in. And regret it the next day. But changes are happening. Now I need to work on a stronger routine for the mornings and get my daughter out the door dressed and with a full belly (and hopefully soon with a smile on her face eager to start the day, too). And then there's the ever-present getting dinner made dilemma. Ugh. That one may require a week or two of it's own.

Pause for Back to School

This week I've been a mess. In pretty much every way. My daughter started Junior Kindergarten. It's been a stressful, teary, guilty, not focused on me week. And that's okay. It will get better. Hopefully next week will be easier and I can get back to reading my textbook and adding new things to my list. But this week is just about survival. Emotional survival. Not thriving yet.